She Did What She Could Blog Tour with Elisa Morgan

What is the premise behind your new book, She Did What She Could?

Most of us care deeply about the needs around us – poverty, injustice, everyday concerns of those in our families and in our offices and in our neighborhoods. But faced with the challenges of getting food on the table and children to and from activities and keeping up with our jobs etc, we feel more than a little overwhelmed. Who has the time or the energy to start another nonprofit or to participate in yet another celebrity-help-the-world-athon? We conclude we have to do something BIG to make a difference. Not true. We don’t have to do something BIG to make a difference. In a Bible story where Mary of Bethany anoints Jesus with a beautiful gift of perfume before his death, Jesus applauds her action saying, “She did what she could.” We can make a difference every day by simply doing what we could in the given moment before us.

When did the idea for this book/movement come to you?

I’d been reading what I call the “Girl Stories” in the gospels – stories where a woman is the main character. I was stopped in my tracks by Mary’s acting out her love for Jesus and by his pairing her action with the gospel. Mary lived loved. She acted out her faith by doing something with who she was and what she had in a moment that mattered. At the same time I was reading that story, I was suddenly overwhelmed by issues in our world like the HIV-AIDS pandemic and poverty and needs everywhere I turned. I began to think about the power of one of us acting and then another and another. I began to prayerfully wonder – what if I did what I could – just like Mary did? And then each of us did what we could? The whole world could be changed!

What percentage of church members are active in ministry?

It’s reported that 20% of the people do 80% of the work.

What reasons do you think members have for not serving?

Lots of folks don’t participate due to the busyness of life and the perception that unless we do something BIG it won’t make a difference. We feel guilty that we can’t do MORE. We feel inadequate because we aren’t more godly – or because of something hidden in our past. We feel incompetent because we aren’t trained. We’re tired and overwhelmed. And then there’s the fact that lots of us aren’t even “members” of a church. We’re not sure what to do with church – even though we love Jesus. We have a million struggles that keep us from “doing”. SDWSC gives a bite-size offering to everyone to participate in living out our faith and making a difference.

Do you feel that many church members are intimidated by those who are very involved at church?
You bet. If you’re not in the “in crowd” or gifted with public gifs like teaching or are marginalized in some way, it’s WAY intimidating to step up and say, ”Hey, I’d like to help.” SDWSC welcomes ALL to join in and act. It refreshes those who are weary in well-doing as well.

In the book, you point out that this message of everyone doing what they can is Biblical. What story are you referring to specifically?

The story is told in Mark 14 but is also told in Matthew and John as well. Just before Jesus’ death on the cross for the sins of all humankind, Mary of Bethany took a jar of nard, a very expensive perfume, and poured it on Jesus – as a symbol of anointing his body before his death. In a moment when the gesture would mean the most to him. You get the impression that Mary hadn’t really planned out this action. It seems more spontaneous. And while the nard was expensive, that wasn’t the main point. Mary acted out of her understanding that Jesus really was the Christ and he really loved her. She wanted to give back. She took what she had – nard – and acted with it in a moment that mattered to Jesus and to the world. She did what she could.

You’ve shared your message with the MOPS organization. What has the response been so far to the SDWSC (She Did What She Could) movement?

Moms are passionate about being the best moms they can be. They’re also passionate to make a difference in their world. They know that they may not be able to do something GIANT in the day to day of raising children. SDWSC gives them a methodology for acting in a way that matters in their daily lives. With a neighbor or a coworker. With a child. To care for the earth. To reach out to someone who has less and needs more. Moms have pasted the SDWSC flare on their Facebook pages and are telling the SDWSC stories, encouraging others to do what they can as well.

How do you hope churches and ministries will use your message to mobilize their members?

Those who’ve never served can be invited to join in with the practical – doable – message of SDWSC. And those who are weary in well-doing can be encouraged that Jesus doesn’t ask us to do EVERYTHING or ALL we could but rather WHAT we could do.

How do you hope readers can change their lives with your message?

She did what she could (SDWSC) is a mantra that rules my days as opportunities come before me. I run each through the grid of SDWSC. Is it something that I can uniquely handle? Is it a moment that matters NOW? Will I make a difference if I do WHAT I could – not ALL or EVERYTHING I could? I hope and pray that readers will do the same. She did what she could. When I do what I could and you do what you could and we do what we could – we can change the world. We can be the body of Christ in action, on the earth, demonstrating individually and together what it means to live loved.

Kathryn Bonner Confessions of a Pastor’s Wife blog tour

Kathryn, when and how did you first get the inspiration to write “Confessions Of A Pastor’s Wife”?

I write about this in the intro of the book. It was literally like a burning bush moment for me. In 2004 God gave me all of the chapter titles all at once. He was literally speaking this book into me! I never expected it! It’s one of the reasons the subtitle is “He Speaks, Can You Hear Him?” I literally ran into my office and grabbed my prayer journal and began writing all of the chapter titles down as fast as He was delivering them to me. They came in perfect speed – it was overwhelming and awesome! I stood there in amazement staring at each chapter title – knowing what would be in every single chapter! Of course, immediately thereafter began to have all of the feelings of being unable, unworthy, and unqualified to do this work. But it was God who gave it to me and He who made the way for it to be completed.

What was the process of writing this book work? Was this an all-at-once kind of epiphany or did this take years in the making, collecting thoughts and ultimately putting them together?

I mentioned before how God gave me the book to write in 2004, but it wasn’t until 2006 that I really began to write it. He had to build my faith further, nudging me along. One of the ways in which He continued the prompting was that He provided me with a life coach to hold me accountable, to push me. Then once I finally surrendered all of the self-doubt, unworthiness and fears I began standing it this beautiful place of faith, with His power. He gave me a joy around it and then I began to write. It was like opening up a vein, it just began to flow. There were times when I couldn’t pull myself away from the writing, that’s when the writing is great! That’s when you feel the power of God, the Holy Spirit moving through you, Him speaking. That’s the gift He gives me in it. I am so thankful for this gift. It’s all from Him, all of it. I love it.

One of the chapters in your book that is titled “Discovering God” you say that there are “moments when God speaks to you through your dreams” does God still speak to you in your dreams?

Oh yes, He sure does, and I hope He never stops! He also speaks to my husband in dreams. Dreams seem to be one of the ways He has revealed major transactions that are headed our way. He speaks profoundly to me through the dreams. It’s not every day, but when it happens it’s intense. In the book I write about some of the dreams He has given me that have come to pass. He’s also done so with Bruce.

You talk about the many ways in which God speaks to us, do you hear His voice as an audible voice or is it an inner sensing voice? Also can you share a few ways in which God speaks and reveals Himself to us, while backing this up through Scripture?

I don’t hear Him in an audible voice, it’s an inner voice that I hear Him, and I hear Him through His Word. Some Biblical references in which God speaks to us are: Exodus 3:14: God said to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’” ACTS 9:15: “But the Lord said to Ananias, ‘Go! This man is my chosen instrument to carry my name before the Gentiles and their kings and before the people of Israel.’” 2 Timothy 3:16-17: “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”

The book frequently takes a humorous approach; I found the chapter titled “The Bug Truck to be deep and absolutely hilarious all at the same time. It has a kind of an intimate “ya ya sisters” kind of thing? Do you think of your book as something that will appeal more to women than to men? Why or why not?

Women love it, and they laugh as they fly through the pages and then they cry as they land on the very next sentence. It’s been very soul stirring. You know, at first I thought that it would have an appeal mainly to women; however, I am getting incredible feedback and actual responses from men. Men are really able to relate to this book on numerous levels. They have shared how parts of it have essentially moved them emotionally as well. This book is about marriage, talks about becoming a blended family, and talks a lot about Bruce and his approach to our marriage, speaks to raising our children, financial concerns, and being a supportive partnership in marriage. So it has been speaking volumes to men, which I am glad to hear… God is good.

How did your husband Bruce support your efforts with the book?

Bruce was totally supportive. He was an encourager to me. He prayed for me, he knew that this was something new for me and he enjoyed the process along with me. I think he was rather fascinated with the way that God had spoken this book into me.

Was he at all curious of just how much “confessing” appears in the book?

I’m sure he was a bit, but interestingly enough he wasn’t asking to read it, he wasn’t asking me what I was writing. I found that interesting, because if it were him writing a book, I know that my curiosity would get to me, I’d want to read each page as it was written. He didn’t do that at all. He just watched me as I wrote, sat back and smiled at it all.

What do you think is the essence of what you felt compelled to say?

Oh wow, that feels like a loaded question! There are so many things regarding faith, family, how God moves and so much more. I think the two main things that I want people to recognize is how God uses each of us, and the other thing would be the most beautiful and profound ways He speaks to us. He uses you to speak into my life, into my heart, to hear Him. This book is a portion of my life story, (not all of it certainly and there are more books to come). In this non-fiction faith story, you will find pieces of your very own faith story as you turn the pages, you will hear the quiet whispers being spoken lovingly straight into your very own ears. God has a way of speaking; He has a desire to be heard, and to be trusted by us. He has such wonderful and glorious things to reveal to us, not only through His powerful Word, but also through all of His people. I am compelled by God to share the ways in which HE SPEAKS to us, all of the many and wondrous ways… through Dreams, through Wise Counsel, through the Stillness of Meditation Alone in our Closets, through The Whisper of the Wind, through a Bumper Sticker, through Children, through the Clouds, and in so many other ways! None of them are farfetched at all! I want it to be known how the Holy Spirit works, in the holy and mysterious ways. He wants us to hear Him so He uses the multifaceted ways to grab us, ways that He knows we will hear. The Bible reveals to all of us many of the ways He speaks. Through Clouds, through Donkeys, through Burning bushes and the list goes on and on. Our lives are a walk of faith, struggle, joy, and more struggles and more faith, but we are never alone, never without El Roi – Our God who sees us.

How has the book been received so far by those who have read it?

It’s been really cool for me. My sister called after she read it and said “Wow, I’m so surprised, pleasantly surprised!” She didn’t realize the writing ability that I had; I laughed and said that I had no idea either. My mom and dad love it, and of course they would. My mother-in-law raves about it and says I should be on Oprah, which makes me laugh. Bruce loves it, of course. My kids adore it; my sons-in-law enjoy it and are proud of me, Of course each of my family members would respond that way. What has been wonderful to see though is all the reader responses on Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble, all give it 5 Star ratings, even men have made comments on it. The other blessings are the emails and calls and notes that I have received telling me how the book has moved them, how it’s spoken to them, increased their faith walk, made sense in areas of their lives where they needed that exact Word from God. Others, tell me that there are so many places that they can relate, and still others tell me that they feel like they know me better, and understand the way that God Speaks because of it. This is the essence of the book, and speaks directly to the subtitle “HE SPEAKS CAN YOU HEAR HIM?”

What, in your opinion, will readers find most surprising about the life of a pastor’s wife?

That we are just as human as they are, we make mistakes. I will make more mistakes, certainly not intentionally, just because I am human. I am very honest and candid in sharing my truth, my life, and my confessions of when and how I have messed up, done things the wrong way and what I’ve learned from it. I think that they can have certain expectations of who we are as a “Pastor’s Wife” or who we should be, that in reality we just aren’t. And yet, they may also find that to be refreshing. I am a leader among women, and enjoy that role, and I am a woman who loves the Lord with every inch of myself and want so badly for the world to love Him as much as I do. I hope that they find me to be normal, very real, and see that I am trying to walk out my faith the best I can. They may be surprised to note that in my daily living I am a bit ditsy, (OK, maybe that won’t really be surprising! 🙂

What are your plans for the future in the publishing world? Think you have any more books in you?

Oh yes, there are at least four more to come. I have also written a Bible Study Companion to this book, it’s in the first stages of completion. I have written a guided Biblical Meditation titled “In The Potters Hand” which is derived from Jeremiah 18:1-5, and it is beautiful, and profound and straight from God. It can be found on http://www.AwakeningsLifeCoaching.com. I am also in the beginning stages of the second book now. This is truly a calling the Lord has placed right in the middle of my heart.

What else does God have you doing these days Kathryn, and how can our readers connect with you?

I am in the process of writing more books, and just finished the Bible Study Companion to this book. I am a Life Purpose Coach, and I do two day 1-1 individual retreats facilitating Life Plans for women, the part I love is which is an amazing thing to witness, is when a women discovers her purpose and passion. My husband also does Life Plans for men. We do couples’ Life Plans as well. I am an instructor through LPCCI for those who are interested in becoming a Life Coach. I am an international speaker and enjoy traveling to the various parts of the world encouraging and sharing the wonders of God! My websites are http://www.AwakeningsLifeCoaching.com (based on Isaiah 50:5 “He awakens me morning by morning…) and http://www.KathrynBonner.com I am putting together Writers Retreat in September for Christian Women. They can register for this retreat and find out more about this opportunity by going to my website http://www.WomenOfPassionatePurpose.com.

Linda Newton “12 Ways to Turn Your Pain Into Praise: Biblical Steps to Wholeness in Christ” Blog Tour

Opening: I’m delighted to be here with you sharing about something that puts wind in my sails—helping people heal from emotional pain and lead empowered lives.

What a timely book, 12 WAYS TO TURN YOUR PAIN INTO PRAISE: BIBLICAL STEPS TO WHOLENESS IN CHRIST! With our current economic and political climate we certainly need steps to turn our pain into praise.

I agree. I find that the same tools that help us deal with our damaged past can guide us through an insecure future. I wrote this book to help people who feel “stuck” because of the dysfunction, divorce, depression, abuse, grief and guilt in their lives, but I am walking through these same principals each day in my counseling office with folks who are dealing with the difficulties of job loss, anxiety, and marriage issues in a struggling economy.

You’re a counselor and an abuse survivor. Will you tell us a little of your story?

I grew up in the deep South and I wish I could say we spent happy hours saying, “Yes Ma’am” and “No Sir” and “Good Night, John-Boy.” But nothing could be further from the truth. In reality, I was ten years old before I realized that God’s last name wasn’t damn! My Daddy took off when I was five, and raising four kids alone brought out the worst in my mother. She became abusive with a bust-your-lip, black-your-eye kind of punishment–the kind of pain that stings your face for a while but sears your soul for a lifetime.

The neighbor-lady from across the street took me to church, I found Christ and He changed my life. That church helped me get to Christian college. On my quest for my own healing, I became a Christian counselor and have had the privilege of working with God’s precious people for the past seventeen years in my office at a growing church in California.

You talk about one of those people, Donnetta Jean, as she moves through the steps to get the healing that she needs. Is she a real person?

Donnetta represents the many damaged people in today’s postmodern culture—distanced by pain from the God they desperately need.

When I read a self-help book, I love to see personal examples of the tools presented, but I find myself wondering how the person in the example turns out. In 12 Ways you get to walk through the process from start to finish as you see the healing of Donnetta Jean unfold. Then you know the path for your own healing.

You started each chapter with a word that starts with the letter “P.” That had to take some work.

Each chapter is one of the steps, and I did that to make them easy to remember. I’m at the stage of life when I stop and think and forget to start up again! Alliteration helps things stick in my head.

My first “P” is Perspective. Chapter 3 and 4 include Prayer and the Power we find in God’s Word. They are pivotal parts of recovery, to be sure, but until we adjust our perspective to see what’s good in life, we can’t reap the benefit of prayer and scripture reading. Before I shifted my perspective, God could have parked a burning bush by my front door to convince me of His love, and I would have stamped out the fire and complained about the inconvenience! It took a long time for me to train myself to see the cup half full instead of always seeing it half empty. But without that fundamental change, it wouldn’t matter how much God intervened in my life to bring good, I wouldn’t see it as such.

Can you share the rest of your chapter titles?

1. Predicament: Donnetta Jean Jones
2. Perspective: Honey Let Me Tell Ya
3. Power: I Got a Rock (Which tells us what the Bible says about us.)
4. Prayer: Present In His Presence
5. People: We’re In This Together
6. Patience: Locust Lunch
7. Plan: Jesus In the Rearview Mirror
8. Pardon: The Healing Power of Forgiveness
9. Provision: Jettisoning Emotional Baggage
10. Priorities: Making the Main Thing the Main Thing
11. Passion: Warts and All
12. Purpose: The Real Thing
Epilogue–Praise: Chocolate Chip Muffins.

This book can serve as a workbook for the reader as well, right?

Yes, at the end of each chapter, I’ve included an exercise titled, “Truster Reconstructer” to help the reader pause, ponder and personalize each step. I told you I like alliteration! If you complete the exercises in this book you will have the equivalent of 12 sessions of therapy. At the national average of $80 an hour, the price of one book is quite deal! But don’t stop with just one book. 12 Ways works as a powerful small group study. Each chapter presents an obstacle to faith and the scriptural solutions for that obstacle. Women have shared with me they feel like it is equivalent to 12 weeks of applicable Bible study.

In your chapter on People, your mentioned the importance of confidence only you didn’t call it self-esteem. You called it “Jesus-teem.” What does that look like?

We have heard enough over the past few years about self-esteem, but Scripture tells us that when we embrace the Lord’s view of ourselves, we’re free to be comfortable in our own skin. God’s view of us is revealed in his Word and through the compliments of others. In chapter 3 about the Power we find in the Bible, I have included a page full of verses with the personal pronouns left out and a blank space provided for you to write in your name. That way you can take ownership of each verse, let it soak into your soul, and change the way you feel about yourself. When we can fully get our heads around how God feels about us, it changes the way we feel about ourselves. That’s Jesus-teem!

You mentioned compliments defining us. Can you explain that?

My old pastor used to say that compliments are bouquets thrown from the hand of God.
When we don’t take the compliments given to us, it’s as though we are ripping the heads off the flowers God has given us, throwing them to the ground, and stomping them. Compliments are God’s way of telling us who we are. When we receive them it builds our confidence in the qualities and gifts He’s given us. But when we don’t, we remain static and self-critical.

I took those words to heart and stopped dismissing compliments some twenty years ago. In that time God has had the opportunity to remake my self-image. Before that I had to climb a ladder to look an ant in the eye!

“Jesus in the Rearview Mirror,” now there’s a title. Tell us about that chapter.

God has a plan for us, but many times the view we have of what is happening around us as we cruise through life is often challenging, even frightening. From our viewpoint, looking through the windshield, we only see calamity, but all the while God is working. Later, when we look back over our lives, as we peer into the rearview mirror, we are able to see the Plan that God was working out all along. Recognizing God’s plan builds our faith.

In your chapter on Pardon you share about the healing power of forgiveness. It’s not always easy to forgive someone who has caused us pain. Was that difficult for you?

It was one of the hardest things I had to do. That’s why I walk through the process with you. We learn that forgiveness doesn’t make the offender right; it just makes us free. We also see that forgive and forget is not a biblical concept. Instead it’s forgive and set boundaries.

Sometimes the hardest person to forgive is ourselves, and many times we find that we have to forgive God because He didn’t do things the way we thought He should.

You present a powerful prayer exercise to help people unpack their emotional baggage in the chapter on Provision. What can you tell us about that?

Years ago a wonderful Christian counselor taught me this life-changing prayer exercise to help me dump the anger, hurt and resentment of my abuse. Until that point, I thought I would have to bear the burden of my painful childhood forever. But I walked out of her office that day a new person. I have had the privilege of sharing this gift many times in my office and now, I am sharing it for all to read. It’s enough that abuse victims have experienced pain, we don’t have to keep reliving it. We can be set free, thank God!

You tell Donetta’s story of healing and your own story in a way that keeps us turning the pages to see what’s going to happen next. Have you always been a storyteller?
I’ve always loved stories especially ones I can relate to. I recently published two stories in Chicken Soup for the Chocolate Lover’s Soul and one in Chicken Soul for the Tea Lover’s Soul and now What I Leaned From My Dog, due out in October 2009. I believe everybody has a story—a string of stories that make up life. In fact one of the steps in my book to turn pain into praise is to write down those moments in your life when God shows up—the stories of his faithfulness. I call them “Monumental Moments.” After writing down my monumental moments for years, I filled a book with stories that was recently published by Warner Press.

My book of stories, Better Than Jewels: 31 Days of Biblical Insight for a Woman Seeking God is a devotional that starts each day with a scripture from Proverbs and a short relevant story to illustrate that verse. In it, I share more of how God miraculously intervened in my life to turn Tennessee trailer trash into a fully loved follower of Christ! It’s currently available through Barnes & Noble, Amazon.com or on my website LindaNewtonSpeaks.com.

The pain in your life hasn’t hindered your sense of humor, has it?

I hope not! My goal for all the books I write is for the reader to laugh, learn, and leave each page feeling closer to the Lord.

Are you working another book?

Yes. My working title is You Can Fix Stupid: Seven Savvy Choices for Mind, Body and Soul. I deal with people everyday who are in terrible situations that were preventable. I want to give folks information to make better choices and avoid being “stupid.” I am working on a blog on my website that addresses these issues.

What else is on your agenda?

I love speaking and since my books have come out, God has opened doors for me to share with groups all over the world. Folks in today’s busy culture like to have teaching material accessible to play in their cars or on their computers. So I am making CD sets available for each of my retreat topics. Each set has 4, forty-minute talks in a handy labeled holder. They are available on my website LindaNewtonSpeaks.com.

Joy for the Journey: Peace For Your Path reviews some of the topics in 12 Ways to Turn Your Pain Into Praise.
He Delights in You: Rest in His Love helps the listener make the 12-inch drop from the head to the heart to truly understand how crazy God is about His kids—namely the one sitting in your seat!
Communication Drive: The Road to Caring Communication is a series presented at a communication workshop that teaches you how to “talk with the hand” not talk to the hand as often happens when we find ourselves in conflict!
Stress Management for the New Millennium: What to Do When Your Reality Check Bounces to offer tools to help the listener deal with the anxiety, anger and depression that modern culture manufactures. I’ve recently finished a series on how to get the most out of your prayer life. Women’s retreats are my passion and I would love to speak at yours. You can contact me on my website.

Is there anything else you would like to tell us about your book?

Since the book’s release last fall I have heard feedback from readers and I can say with confidence that whether you are seeking tools to empower those you are helping or needing the tools to transform yourself, you will walk away from this book spiritually stronger as you learn to:
• remove your offender’s face from God and stop blaming Him for life’s pain
• stop renting space in your head to bad memories and offenses
• relinquish the stinkin’ thinkin’ that causes you to emotionally circle the drain
• stay constantly connected to Christ with time-tested tools to process your pain
• realize your full potential as you seek God’s divine purpose for your life.

Closing: Thanks so much for having me on your blog. I hope your readers will visit me online at http://www.LindaNewtonSpeaks.com. Please remember that God deeply desires to turn your pain into to praise.